so. i have decided something. the loss of this almost stranger has impacted me more than i ever could have imagined. as my throat constricts and my eyes burn, i cant decide if they are tears of sorrow and fear… or awe. death today, life tomorrow. whats so scary about death if theres something even better after these moments? i have decided i do not fear death, nor do i fear its coming. i only fear pain. for death… can do nothing to me. nothing will shake me from my lords arms.
And nodding by the fire, take down this book,
And slowly read, and dream of the soft look
Your eyes had once, and of their shadows deep;
How many loved your moments of glad grace,
And loved your beauty with love false or true;
But one man loved the pilgrim soul in you,
And loved the sorrows of your changing face.
And bending down beside the glowing bars,
Murmur, a little sadly, how love fled
And paced upon the mountains overhead,
And hid his face amid a crowd of stars.” —by William Butler Yeats